Who do I address my

I'm busy writing my Thank You cards and I've hit a bit of a snag. One of my aunts flew up country specifically for the wedding, in fact she went out of her way to attend and in addition gave us a wonderful gift. The thing is that her husband (my uncle) didn't come with her, didn't call us to congratulate us or anything. He's retired so has enough time, has enough money to have come with her and he has known me my whole life.





So should I address the Thank You card to her and only her or should I include him (as in "Dear Aunty Jane and Uncle Jim")?



I think I would thank both of them in the card for the gift, but maybe write a special message in it specifically addressed to your Aunt Jane saying how much you appreciate her traveling so far to your wedding.





She'll most likely be the only one that reads it anyway, men don't usually care about reading those types of things.




If their card was signed with both names then, most definitely, address the Thank You to both of them (nothing wrong with putting her name first thought!).





However, if she came alone, and did not sign his name to the card, you may want to ask another family member just to make sure that there isn't some sort of turmoil in their relationship that could make your Aunt feel worse if she received a card with his name in it.





When in doubt though, it is better to give undeserved thanks, than to slight someone, especially a relative.




bite the bullet and write it to them both. check the card, though, and see if she signed both names on the card and/or gift. If so, DEFINITELY write it to both. However, even if it's just signed by her, I would write it to both (definitely her name first, though) just to be polite and take the upper road.





* I read you "additional..." definitely write it to both. It doesn't seem he was vindictive or anything.




Address it to both, but include a special message for just your aunt:





Dear Aunty Jane and Uncle Jim,





Thank you so much for blah blah blah blah ...





Aunty Jane, it warmed our hearts that you made a special trip to be present at our wedding ... blah blah blah etc.





Love,





You.




I would only address it to the one who showed up...Since he didn't have enough time to come then you didn't have enough time to write his name on the thank you card... Plus who was the gift from on the card. Just her or both?




I would address it to whoever signed the card. If it said aunt judy then just her but if it said both then send it to both.




you can skip it all together just put the last name on the envelope and on the card, just start it with thank you so much we love the gift.........




Welll, My Opinion, He Didn't Go, So You should Only Address Her For Going, But, Like I Said, Thats My Opinion




Dear Aunty Jane and Uncle Jim would be nice. Maybe there was a reason he didn't come and you just don't know about it,




Just write it to both. Don't cause WWIII over this.




I would include him, too. Maybe he'll feel guilty!




Don't be snooty. Even if you feel his actions were rude, don't be rude in return. Address the thank you note to them both, especially since both their names were on the card. I've given plenty of gifts and signed my fiance's name. I even went to a wedding last week that he couldn't attend and made sure to put both our names on the card. Just because he didn't contribute directly doesn't mean the sentiment wasn't there.





Also, especially since it was such a nice gift, you want to come across as equally grateful, not disappointed that he didn't contribute. If you didn't include his name, it might even offend her and think the thank you is not as sincere.




I would address it to both, it would be the polite thing to do. That way no one can turn it around on your either. Who knows it sounds as if your uncle may have a type of panic disorder and may be very uncomfortable out of his element/around large groups and/or in new places (agoraphobia). Try and be sensitive and just suck it up and be the nice girl ( I know family stuff can be difficult and Im sure you dont want to be the cause of a dispute)